I am so exhausted from trying to act happy for everybody around me. At work all day, at home all night, for my friends and for my family. Its so tiring and hard to stay positive all day every day for the sake of someone else. Trying not to make them feel bad or bring their mood down. Im to the point where i can barely smile let alone be happy. Not a single person until now knows this. Not my friends, family, no one. Its because i try to hide everything because its easier for everyone else that way. My problem is i try to make other people happy. Not that i have to, ive always liked making people happy. But its so hard when you arent even the slightest bit happy. Where everyday is a struggle to smile.. Im so exhausted to the point where i cant think straight, my sleeping is fucked up. Im always tired and feel physically weak at times. Fuck why cant this all just go away.. I just want to be happy for me, not because i feel like i have to for someone else.